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00009: \XLa, la​.​^​3 &Time to wake&up and​\​R smell​\​X &the​^​4 pain​.​/ (Everyone I Know And Love Is Dead)

from wHAT by Roxy Radclyffe

/

lyrics

here's no delight in this that's taken
increasing awareness i'm not mistaken
say hell's so real i know who's thrown in there
all those connections ever known clear
encapsulates most i've met outside of family
many simply admired left unknown
many friendly desired for sure they'll go
there's ten things they need to know

i sit back and grasp to accept this
never again i'll make an ass of the self to spread it
once slipped in package of indoctrination
by the best suggestion of maternal inclination
discomforting to fill the air and get us nowhere
neither could that final famed wager
all i'm left with, the reality that's been built
all this blood that's destined to spill

u did good in ur heart
it's not enough, fall apart
pierce through the final shard
the wrong way's all u got
more to this than u thought
none friendly left to guard
go take it up with god
see if that'll get us far

everyone i know and love is dead
everyone i know and love is dead
everyone i know and love is dead
everyone i know and love is dead

time to wake up and smell the grave
tried as u might, meet ur forever fate
let's make use of that imagination
it's the highest level of anything u hate

we seek to warn u of the brimstone within
the demons hone in on this sensitive skin
it's one rip, then burn the shit to unheard degrees
only they hear ur scream as u bleed like never seen

u did good in ur heart
it's not enough, fall apart
pierce through the final shard
the wrong way's all u got
more to this than u thought
none friendly left to guard
go take it up with god
see if that'll get us far

everyone i know and love is dead
everyone you know and love is dead
everyone they know and love is dead
everyone we know and love is dead

you'll wish for just a single lesser moment
if there's nothing u regret yet, that's something to invent
u beg, plead, tongue clinging for a trace of hydration
wouldn't have to be the case if u had greater faith maybe

time drains into nothing, puddle of pain never dissolving
no such thing as a "day", bodies decay & regenerate
for every possible way to break the innards of these "sinners"
ur memories disintegrate, only remaining is the price u pay



[...]



there's no circles here, it's all the worst when you're forsaken
and the reason this is all actually okay is..

you didn't fucking believe!
that's the way it is, u see
they didn't fucking believe!
ooh, such a damn shame, but who's to blame?
they didn't fucking believe

what about my father's lifelong friend, considered by the whole family to be a brother?
he doesn't fucking believe!
he was scared away by judgmental dickheads in response to a tragic accident
he'll never fucking believe!

i first feared of this with my original crush as i was twelve
she didn't fucking believe!
so i compensated with a conversation, a buddy educates me on the levels of hell
which we don't fucking believe!

it's not so sadistic if you just don't think about it
but the jig's come to an end for this old friend
so do i take the risk? or let us all be separated?
would i rather be perpetually killed? or live amidst those deranged enough to think any average person deserves this in the first place?

i'm not so sure i still want his "love" with how much it truly hurts
and i can't bear to associate with the real freaks we face

credits

from wHAT, released April 30, 2022

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Roxy Radclyffe North Carolina

♥ Eternal Reflective Girl ♥

~Visit the neocities for a full list of aliases & other projects~

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